Why Not Build?

There’s been a lot of discussion about house prices lately, with people wondering if they’ll ever be able to own a home. It seems like a legitimate concern until you remember that the world will be over because of an alien invasion within a few years. I keep going on about this, although nobody seems to believe me. I’ve seen visions of the invasion, and let me assure you, it’s coming. Giant space shuttles that shoot destructive lasers from their bases, obliterating our cities and our homes. So, don’t worry about finding the best custom home designers near the Mornington Peninsula. You’ll put all this time into building your dream home, only for it to be completely destroyed because of aliens by 2030.

People ask how I know about this alien invasion. As I mentioned, I’ve had visions, but that wasn’t how I learned the truth. A few months ago, I was at the beach down in Dromana when a seagull approached me, seeming to want one of my hot chips. I agreed to give it one, and it confided in me that seagulls are actually aliens, scouting out our world. He told me all about the planned invasion and said I would receive some important dreams regarding it. I don’t blame you for not believing me. In fact, I didn’t even believe it myself, at first. I was in the middle of negotiating with luxury home contractors so I could build my own dream house. It wasn’t until I started searching on the internet that I realised the talking seagull was telling the truth. If you do the research, you’ll realise it too!

I totally understand if you think I’m crazy, though. My claims are pretty wild, and nobody gives chips to seagulls, so they’ll never reveal their plans to anyone else. So go on, build your dream house. I can’t really blame you. But don’t say I didn’t warn you when it gets ruined in the oncoming alien invasion.